A Trip to Sea World: The Untamable Manatee, the Mooning Walrus, and Other Tails (Though, Thankfully, No More Atrocious Puns)
-George Gordon, Lord Byron
Amid all the waiting I get to do, I also get some pretty fun field trips. See, Darren encouraged me to get out and do something fun too before my mission – do something to remember. He suggested a theme park. I guess he thought I’d be going to Disney Land. But if I was going to charge into a theme park, I knew exactly the one that would make me and perhaps few others in my family happy: Sea World.
At first, I wanted it to be a big thing, all the family flooding through the gates and jumping into the dolphin pool before any security guards could even think about stopping us. But, not only would that be a little alarming for the dolphins (not to mention a little contaminating for their environment), what with the house being filled with what felt like eighty-gazillion Robinsons, forty-gazillion of them being one very cute baby we just had to cuddle and smoozle and play with, Sea World just didn’t get done.
Eventually, it was just Krista and me buying tickets and entering the park. Sad to say, we didn’t flood the gates or jump into any pools, though we did run away from those people who take pictures of you and try to get you to pay for them. Take that, Sea World security!
Anyway, Krista and I have actually been twice and are planning to go again – but don’t panic, Darren of the wise wallet. We only went again because it was economical. That’s right, I used that word. You see, for the same price as a one day ticket, you can get a ticket that gets you in as many times as you want for a whole year. And, seeing as how gas is cheaper and we bring our own food, I say it’s only cutting the ticket price down to keep going back.
And it was so worth it!
In just our two days in the park, Krista and I fell off a manatee, got sneezed on by a walrus, got our knuckles sucked on by floppy bat rays, met Flotsam and Jetsam and all their babies (bet you didn’t know Jetsam was a girl eel, did ya?), and met an old friend at the dolphin tank.
Of course, the manatee wasn’t a real manatee. Well, I mean, it was real – as in, it was solid. But I don’t think it was ever alive. It was a statue one, you see. We tried to get this lady to take a picture of us on top of it, but Krista had hurt her groin muscle so bad we couldn’t both get on top of it – and then we did get on top of it, but then Krista started sliding off and I tried to grab her, but instead she fell off and I landed on her. So we took a picture in front of the manatee that vanquished us.
But I wasn’t kidding about the bat rays sucking on our knuckles – well, Krista’s knuckles. The trainers tell you, when you’re feeding the rays, to keep the fish tight between your two fingers. What they don’t tell you is that, when the ray comes and starts trying to suck up the fish, that’s a good time to let go of the thing. So Krista just laughed and laughed, wondering why it wasn’t taking the fish while it was sucking up her fist.
And this is my good buddy Beaker in the dolphin tank. She’s the dolphin I got along best with when I did Sea World’s Trainer for a Day program. Isn’t she perdy?
Oh, and of course, you can’t go to Sea World and not see the shows. The Shamu show now is called “Believe” – and is about two worlds, two species “coming together” as never before. It was kind of cheesy – but then Shamu jumped out of the water with a trainer standing on his face and he launched the guy like a cannon and the guy did a bunch of flips thirty feet in the air and then dived into the water. They can call the show whatever they want as long as they do that.
The dolphin show is always great. And this time the Sea Lion show was funnier than ever. They had to cut it short because all the walrus wanted to do was twirl upside-down in the water with his butt sticking up in the air. But that’s what they get when they name him “Admiral Bigg’nBottom.”
So, over all, was Sea World a good choice? Oh yeah – I am so going back. Besides, Krista and I’ve got some unfinished business to attend to. We’ve got to salute a darling Admiral, sneeze on his uncle, and teach a certain manatee some respect (slam fist into palm here).
Watch out, Sea World security, we’re coming back!
(Examine the pictures above and below. I’m fiercely proud of them, as I took them with an ordinary disposable camera and as Krista and I worked hard to shield the camera from a soaking at the shows, sacrificing our dryness, etc. Also, the Joshua Tree/Palmdale photos are mine too. Huzzah!)